Garage

985. ‘Dry Your Eyes’, by The Streets

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It’s still July, but can we already declare 2004 as the year of the break-up song?

Dry Your Eyes, by The Streets (their 1st and only #1)

1 week, 25th July – 1st August 2004

We’ve had spiky break-up #1s from Busted, and the dreaded Eamon and Frankee, as well as maudlin break-up songs from Mario Winans and Usher. What’s interesting about ‘Dry Your Eyes’ is that it manages to straddle the two moods.

In fact, Mike Skinner seems to be going through the seven stages of grief during this three or four minute (depending which mix you listen to) track. There’s sadness, denial, pleading, and anger. We go from Everything’s just gone, I’ve got nothing, Absolutely nothing… to I’m not gonna fucking just fucking leave it all now… and various stop-offs in between. It also goes into a lot of strangely specific detail about where and how he and his girlfriend are placing their hands.

I remember this song getting a lot of critical attention at the time. It is a unique track, half-rap/half-spoken word, from an influential act in British hip-hop, grime, garage… you name it. Yet it doesn’t make me care. It doesn’t move me. And I know I complained about the nastiness in Busted and Eamon’s break-up songs, but at the same time I’m not convinced that just because a confirmed lad like Mike Skinner wrote an apparently touching and vulnerable track about being dumped that it’s any better. (This was the follow-up to the far more degenerate – and better, in my eyes – ‘Fit But You Know It’.)

(…getting personal for a second, I don’t think my aversion to break-up songs stems from any personal trauma. Nor does it stem from a lack of experience. When a relationship of ten and a half years ended, I did turn to music. I turned to Dusty Springfield. ‘All I See Is You’ is the ultimate break-up song. It renders a tune like ‘Dry Your Eyes’ completely and utterly insignificant…)

Another downside to ‘Dry Your Eyes’ is that I remember my mum liking it. Which means it must have been getting played on Radio 2. Which means that The Streets had officially lost their street-cred. Not that I am snobby against my mum’s taste in music – we have lots of favourite acts in common – but when middle-class, middle-aged mums are citing your song to show they are still ‘with it’, then I’d be tempted to utter the words ‘sell-out’. For context, the one other 21st century artist my mum has claimed to like is Ed Sheeran…

The Streets, a musical project of up to seven members and led by the already mentioned Mike Skinner, had been around since the early nineties. They released their first music in the early ‘00s, and their first two albums (‘Dry Your Eyes’ was from the second) were hugely popular, influential, and critically acclaimed. And yes, this is an interesting, innovative – even unique – number one. It just doesn’t do much for me.

868. ‘7 Days’, by Craig David

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Of all the year 2000’s many, many number ones (this being twenty-four out of forty-two), is Craig David’s ‘7 Days’ its most famous…?

7 Days, by Craig David (his 2nd and final #1)

1 week, from 30thJuly – 6th August 2000

There aren’t many Brits of my vintage who can’t still recite Craig’s week of wooing: I met this girl on Monday, Took her for a drink on Tuesday, We were making love by Wednesday, and on Thursday, and Friday, and Saturday… (sounds exhausting, to be honest…) We chilled on Sunday…

Like his first chart-topper, ‘Fill Me In’, this is light and airy commercial garage. The Spanish guitar riff and insistent beat make it more instantly appealing than its predecessor, and the chorus is as memorable as they come. It’s calmer, more confident, a fact also reflected in the lyrics. No longer is Craig David creeping around behind his girlfriend’s parents’ backs. Oh no, here he’s picking up a twenty-four year old ‘cinnamon queen’ in an underpass… She asks him for the time, and the rest is history.

The call and response bit, in which his friends quiz him on his conquest, is fun too, Was it for real…? Damn sure… It’s like ‘Summer Nights’ for the new millennium. Elsewhere, though, it does meander a little. Again, this is garage’s problem, in that it is so breezy in places that sometimes it fails to land. But, I’ll stick with my initial claim, in terms of the record’s sound being peak-2000, and the chorus being an era-defining earworm.

It also feels very old-fashioned too, twenty-five years down the line, when everyone now meets their romantic partners on the apps. Imagine approaching someone in a subway (he’s using the word in the British sense, rather than the American) and asking them out on a date. The 2025 version of this song wouldn’t get past day one, and would probably end in a restraining order.

It would be easy to argue that Craig David’s career peaked early, with his first two solo singles giving him his only two number ones. But he’s had a near twenty-year stretch of Top 40 hits, and thirteen further Top 10s. I’ll give a shout out to ‘Walking Away’ and ‘Don’t Love You No More (I’m Sorry)’ as two favourites of mine. However, he is probably just as well known in Britain for being played in caricature by Leigh Francis on ‘Bo’ Selecta!’, a massively popular comedy. David has both claimed to have been fine with his portrayal in the show; and has described it as “racist blackface”, and “hurtful beyond belief”. He probably does have a point, though, in claiming that it affected his career.

855. ‘Fill Me In’, by Craig David

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If the year 2000 has a defining sound – and I’m far from convinced that it does, with so many chart-toppers crammed into its fifty-two weeks – then UK garage would be a strong candidate.

Fill Me In, by Craig David (his 1st of two #1s)

1 week, from 9th – 16th April 2000

These staccato, two-step beats have started to appear more regularly, with Shanks & Bigfoot last year, and to a lesser extent Gabrielle a few weeks ago. I never particularly liked garage at the time – it always felt too light, too airy, too difficult to grab a hold of. It dances around the beat, without ever committing to it. Garage makes me think of a hummingbird flitting from flower to flower, impossible to catch. A strange image for a musical genre, perhaps, but one that works for me.

And eighteen-year-old Craig David, Southampton’s most famous chart-topper, is an equally strong candidate for the year’s breakout star. He has a soft, honeyed voice, and controls this lyric-heavy song despite lacking what I would describe as ‘oomph’. (That’s what garage lacks – oomph!) It tells the story of a young couple trying to get jiggy in the face of her over-protective parents. Calls diverted to answer phone, Red wine bottle half the contents gone, Midnight return, Jacuzzi turned on… Can you fill me in? her folks ask.

Clearly Southampton is a bit posher than where I grew up, as I never knew anyone with a jacuzzi. The Wikipedia entry for ‘Fill Me In’ amusingly claims the song as a commentary on helicopter parenting, though I’m not sure there are many parents, helicopter or otherwise, that would be thrilled upon discovering their teenage daughter had been in a jacuzzi with the next door neighbours’ randy son, guzzling their wine. It is an interesting twist, however, to have a song about teenage lust told from the parents’ point of view.

Listening back to this now, a quarter of a decade later, and I’m more disposed to it than I was at the time. There’s something light, yes, but carefree too; though maybe that’s just nostalgia. As garage goes, this is way over to the poppier side of the genre. It owes as much to American R&B – TLC, Usher, Destiny’s Child and the like – as it does to UK MCs spitting rhymes on council estates.

Craig David had announced himself to the world as the vocalist on Artful Dodger’s ‘Re-Rewind (The Crowd Say Bo Selecta)’ right at the end of 1999. That is an era-defining single, although it fell just short of appearing in this countdown. (‘Bo Selecta’ is a phrase that will come to haunt David, but more on that later.) His second #1 is also a real cultural moment, leaving ‘Fill Me In’ in the strange position of being Craig David’s first chart-topper, but not one of the two songs everyone remembers him for.

847. ‘Rise’, by Gabrielle

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If there was an award for the artist that has flirted most with the number one spot on the UK charts without ever getting a date – the ‘nearly number one’ award – then Bob Dylan would be hot favourite to win. ‘Mr. Tambourine Man’ and ‘The Mighty Quinn’ were written by him, he sang a couple of lines on ‘We Are the World’, while ‘Knockin’ on Heaven’s Door’ made it in a cover version. All we need now is for someone to sample Dylan on a chart-topping single…

Rise, by Gabrielle (her 2nd and final #1)

2 weeks, from 30th January – 13th February 2000

Well wouldn’t you know… Here is the Bob Dylan-sampling number one. He liked this record so much that he allowed Gabrielle to use the sample – the guitar chords and his vocal harmonies from ‘Knockin’ on Heaven’s Door’ – free of charge. This sample adds a certain excitement to ‘Rise’, but I’m not quite sure what about the song convinced the often cantankerous Dylan to donate his work for gratis.

It’s a delicate, pretty ballad, nicely sung and sparingly arranged, with the gentlest of garage beats. In the ultra-processed, ultra-poppy early days of the 21st century it is a pleasant change of pace at the top of the charts. But ‘Rise’ never quite, ahem, rises above that word: ‘pleasant’. It’s nice enough to hear when it comes on Smooth FM (it has probably been on their playlists for twenty-five years straight), but I’d never rush to search it out.

I’m pretty sure I wrote much the same about Gabrielle’s first #1, ‘Dreams’ (in fact, I gave that a ‘Meh’ Award). There is something safe and very mum-leaning about her two biggest hits. I’ll argue that ‘When a Woman’ (the retro-pop follow-up to ‘Rise’), ‘Out of Reach’ (the ‘Bridget Jones’ soundtrack hit from 2001), or 1996’s big, brassy ‘Give Me a Little More Time’ – would have been worthier number ones.

As much as neither particularly excites me, it is worth noting the near seven-year gap between Gabrielle’s two number one singles. So much musical water has gone under the bridge since 1993 (for a snapshot: ‘Dreams’ knocked UB40 off the top, while ‘Rise’ displaces Britney Spears) that it is impressive how she managed to come back with such a big hit. She would go on scoring Top 20 hits until 2004, and released her most recent album just last year.

So, two number ones for Gabrielle, the most famous eye-patch wearing pop star since Johnny Kidd. And only ten letters between both titles, ‘Dreams’ and ‘Rise’. Has any singer managed to get more success out of even shorter song names? Nichest of niche pop knowledge, but let me know in the comments if you can think of one!

825. ‘Sweet Like Chocolate’, by Shanks & Bigfoot

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I was about to sound the random dance hit klaxon, 1999’s most used alarm, before I noticed that this next number one isn’t really dance. I was going to claim it as drum ‘n’ bass, but then realised that it was actually our first example of a very turn-of-the-century genre: garage.

Sweet Like Chocolate, by Shanks & Bigfoot (their 1st and only #1)

2 weeks, from 23rd May – 6th June 1999

Sadly this has nothing to do with garage rock. Or with car repair. The genre stems from Paradise Garage, a NYC gay nightclub popular in the ‘70s and ‘80s (and which had been built as a parking garage back in the ‘20s). From there we can trace a route from disco in the seventies, to garage house in the eighties (alongside Chicago house acts like Steve ‘Silk’ Hurley), to the 90s when it crossed the Atlantic, got sped up, and became known as UK garage. From there we can look into a future of grime, and drill… A rushed potted history I know, but I’m very amused to discover that this often misogynist and homophobic genre can trace its family tree back to a gay bar presumably full of leather queens and cock-duster moustaches…

Not that there’s anything offensive about ‘Sweet Like Chocolate’. No, our introduction to garage is as light and fluffy as they come, with some staccato strings and a gentle brass section that builds over the 2-step beat that will become one of the sounds of the next few years. I’ll readily admit that I was never – now, or at the time – the biggest fan of the genre, but also that this is as pleasant an intro as we could have wished for.

What I’ve always remember about this record are the high-pitched vocals, from a singer named Sharon Woolf. And the animated video, in which the entire world is made of chocolate (and which now looks wonderfully dated). Oh yes, and the jokes at school about how this might not actually be about chocolate… You are sweet on the tip of my tongue, You are warm like the rays of the sun… (The steamy noises that Woolf makes in the extended original mix only serve to confirm my teenage suspicions.)

Shanks & Bigfoot were a duo called Steven Meade and Danny Langsman, who had had a #20 hit the year before, ‘Straight from the Heart’, under the name Doollally. Following the success of ‘Sweet Like Chocolate’, they released the same song, as Shanks & Bigfoot, and made #9. I wonder if there are any other songs which have charted twice by ‘different’ acts?

Though I’ll probably be down on the many of the garage records which will top the charts between now and 2002, I should emphasise the authenticity of the genre. Garage relied on underground nightclubs, MCs, and pirate radio to break through. I may not much like it, but it was the sound of the streets, like skiffle and punk had been to generations before. Which is something, in an era where manufactured pop held so much sway.