Two posts ago, as we endured B*Witched’s ‘C’est la Vie’, I hinted at an impending tween-pop takeover. Well, don’t say I didn’t warn you…

Because We Want To, by Billie (her 1^st of three #1s)

1 week, from 5^th – 12^th July 1998

Was ‘tweenager’ a word back in 1998? Apparently yes – it was first used in 1949. So we can use it freely to describe this next #1. ‘Because We Want To’, by fifteen-year-old Billie Piper, is perhaps the ultimate tween-pop record: vital to anyone aged eight to twelve when it came out; anathema to anyone even slightly older.

Why you gotta play that song so loud? Because we want to… Why you always run around in crowds? Because we want to… This ode to tweenage rebellion is simplistic, dumb, and annoyingly catchy. The lyrics feel so forced that the modern Gen Alpha cyborgs that pass for children these days would laugh in its face. But the late ‘90s were a simpler time, and clearly this struck a chord with the youth of the day. (I was twelve, and I found it irritating and irrelevant, so I assume most of the 80,000 copies that sent it straight to number one were bought by kids significantly younger than me…)

As much as I don’t like this record, I will make one important distinction: it’s better than ‘C’est la Vie’. But the production is cheap and dated – opening with the quacking duck synths last heard on Whigfield’s ‘Saturday Night’ – and it thumps its way into your brain with its silly, chanty chorus. The middle-eight is the best bit of the song, and owes a debt to the Spice Girls: a mix of Mel B’s rap from ‘Wannabe’ and the chorus of ‘Who Do You Think You Are’.

And right there is the problem. The Spice Girls had been so successful in grabbing the attention – and the pocket money – of children across the world that we’re starting to see a whole range of lesser copycats spring up. First B*Witched, now Billie… Just be glad that Vanilla’s ‘No Way, No Way’ fell short. (Although, let’s be honest, that would have made an iconic number one…)

As with B*Witched, this breakthrough hit set Billie up for a short of burst of chart-topping glory, and she’ll return to these pages soon enough. ‘Because We Want To’ made her the second-youngest female to top the charts, and the youngest since Helen Shapiro in 1961. A lot was made at the time of Billie being the youngest artist ever to ‘enter the charts at #1’, but that seems like an pointless distinction when almost every record was entering the charts at #1 in 1998. Still, it’s an impressive achievement, surpassing anything I was doing aged fifteen (most of which wouldn’t be fit to publish in such polite company…)